Why Do People Have Low Self-Confidence?

Polash is known to be a diligent and hardworking employee. He excels at executing decisions but when it comes to making them, he is always hesitant. He is often quiet during brainstorming sessions and holds himself back in business strategy meetings.

Polash struggles to share his ideas because he’s afraid of what others may think. We’ve all been in Polash’s shoes at some point. It’s not always easy to speak our minds. But anybody can learn how to build confidence and improve their self-esteem. Let’s look at various ways to overcome low self-confidence. 

Meaning Of Self-Confidence

Before we understand why some of us struggle with low confidence, let’s explore what self-confidence means. When you accept and trust your abilities, you have a positive view of yourself. Self-confidence refers to your attitude and belief in your strengths and weaknesses. When you’re self-confident, you set realistic expectations, handle criticism well and communicate assertively.

High or low confidence is mostly based on your perceptions and rarely on your abilities. Negative thoughts and perceptions can often make us doubt ourselves, become sensitive to criticism and feel unimportant. Environmental factors like unsupportive friends, poor parenting styles and bullying are some of the other causes of low self-esteem.

Signs Of Low Self-Confidence

We often mistake low self-esteem with humility. It’s important to recognize this character trait because of its long-term damaging effects. If you’re lacking self-confidence, here are some useful tips to recognize its signs:

1. Finding it difficult to say no to others’ requests—you prioritize their needs over yours.

2. Over-apologizing or feeling guilty for things that you have no control over.

3. Difficulty making decisions and having trouble standing by them.

4. Tendency to please others or seek their approval when making choices.

5. Inability to establish healthy personal boundaries—making you more vulnerable.

6. Being silent, getting defensive or beating yourself up when there’s an argument.

7. Perpetuating negative self-talk—talking harshly being overly critical to yourself.

How To Overcome Low Self-Confidence

If you’re lacking self-confidence, here are a few effective tips that can help you overcome feelings of insecurity and self-doubt.

1. Label Your Emotions

When faced with difficulties, our inner voice is often pessimistic and unhelpful. Labeling your emotions can help you identify what’s holding you back. Negative thoughts often sound like ‘I can’t do this’, ‘I’ll never get what I wanted’ or ‘No one wants to hear what I have to say’.

2. Change Your Perspective

Take active measures towards turning your negative talk into a positive talk. It can be as simple as ‘I’m going to try’. The more you counter negative thinking with positivity, the more you’ll look at things in a different light. Even the smallest actions can make the biggest improvements!

3. Always Plan Ahead

When you make a list of your priorities and objectives, you know what your day or week will look like. You get an idea of your needs and expectations. The more clarity you gain about your priorities, the more personal boundaries you’ll be able to establish.

4. Eliminate Negative Reminders

Avoid spending time around things that make you feel bad. When you get rid of the obstructive sources in your life, it’s easier to move on from painful memories. For example, if you didn’t get accepted into your dream college—delete the rejection email.

5. Make A List Of Your Talents

We’re all great at some things and not so good at others. Consider your strengths and weaknesses, and make a list of things that you’re capable of. Instead of negatively reviewing your weaknesses, identify ways to overcome them. Accept yourself for who you truly are.

6. Maintain A Positive Support Network

Connect and maintain healthy relationships with those who genuinely care and support you. Stay away from constantly critical people who negatively impact your mental well-being. Even the most well-intentioned people can be destructive to your self-confidence. Take time to reflect on who really makes you feel good about yourself. 

7. Be Your Own Cheerleader

We often think that our worth lies in our talents and abilities. Think about the things that make your personality great—your sense of humor, ability to cope under stress or good listening skills. Moreover, try to celebrate even your smallest wins. Treat yourself to a movie or a nice dinner once in a while.

Conclusion

It’s never too late to build or rebuild your self-confidence. However, there may be times when we’re unable to cope with low self-confidence issues. Talk to someone you trust or seek our professional help to understand the source of the issues. Self-awareness is the first step towards self-improvement.

Harappa Education’s Interpreting Self course is designed to foster self-awareness and define your expectations more efficiently. The Johari Window will help you identify your relationship with your ‘self’ and others. The River of Life will teach you how to reflect on life-shaping experiences and learn from them. Understand yourself before you work on yourself!

Explore Harappa Diaries to learn more about topics related Examples Of Insecurities, How To Deal With Burnout & Personal Areas Of Improvement For Self-Evaluation to take a step towards becoming your best self.